Losing Hope In People.

I'm really starting to realize more and more, every day that disappointment in this life is inevitable. You can't escape it no matter how hard you try. It's just a part of life, I think. And for me, if I wasn't a child of God and I didn't believe in God or his promises, I would have given up on life a long time ago. Don't get me wrong, I think about giving up everyday. But it's The Lord who is my strength.

Because of him, I continue on in this life. Without God I am nothing, and apart from him I can do nothing.

 Anyways I don't even know where all of that came from. My original thoughts tonight was on people. And losing hope in people. But who knows? Maybe somebody out there was meant to read those first two paragraphs. Or maybe people have so much to do its life's disappointments that it kind of just flowed in there together. My inner thoughts slipped right in.

You know I've been on this hope kick lately. I've turned my faith up to a higher notch and I've been literally surviving mentally on hope. Without hope in God, how can one even face the day? I surely couldn't. But hope in God is much different than hope in people. There is no comparison. I'm not even putting them in the same category.

Besides how can anyone not have hope in a God who gives us everything when we obviously deserve nothing. Who could not have hope in a God who gave his only son, for us. And caused his blood to cover everyone of our sins. I surely couldn't. But.... I'm losing hope in people. I really am.

I'm one of those people who try to see the best in everyone and in every situation. I'm the type that will love you even if you don't love me. I'll love you when your not lovable and ill forgive you, no matter what you do. When I love, I love hard core. My love is deep. It's unconditional, and it's never ending. A lot like Jesus' love for us. But I'm finding that I have never received this love in return. From anybody. Everyone I know, goes away. They slowly but surely go away. And whatever we once had whether friendship or whatever else may be, disappears. As if it never existed. And I'm slowly but surely just losing hope. I know all things are possible with God. I know God can change anyone and can fix any situation. But when is enough, enough? At what point must one reach to finally just give up? I've never been the quitting kind. I don't give up easily. If I love you, I love you and ill fight for you until I die. Or I have no choice but to give up. I don't know. I just put too much hope in people, top much trust. I think I may be beginning to see....

 I have been too good to people. I wonder if this is how God see's us? He does all he can for us. And still every day, we turn away and sin And we pay more attention to the world around us that is here today and gone tomorrow than to him. Ah as usual. I've come to a conclusion. And now I'm answering my own questions.... God always gives me great revelations when I question things so deeply. Maybe I have much more hope into people and this world. Than I have God (in the past). Maybe he just wants me to learn how to trust in him and only him.

 And also.... You don't give up. Because God has never given up of you. But you can have less hope in humans and more hope in God. Because after all, he created them. And if he wants he can change everything, Even a person, in the blink of an eye.

 Oh life and love is so bittersweet. Dontcha think. A little tooooo ironic, and yeah I really do think. Yeah I totally just made an Alanis Morisette reference after talking deeply about The Lord. But that's just how I roll.

 The Bible says.. Don't put your trust in princes, in mortal men who cannot save. And that my friends is the answer of the night. Don't trust people. Trust God. And don't give up. Even when you want to. God will work it all out in due time. Just continue being you and loving like you do, And in the end you shall reap a harvest if you faint not. And besides.. Wasn't that Jesus' greatest command? To love others, as he loved us. Why yes, yes it was. Love on folks. I'm out.

 P.s this was not directed to anyone in particular. This is the experience of a 26 year old girl, Who loved with her entire existence, And put too much hope in to too many people. Goodnight y'all.